Tonight I had the privilege of having dinner with five guys that I’ve called friends for quite some time. It was a good dinner, my favorite restaurant, and just a relaxing evening over all. As we started to leave, rain began falling and we all rushed to our vehicle to avoid getting wet. Normal reaction I suppose.

As I started to pull away from Texas Roadhouse the sky lit up with different shades of blue and green and thunder shortly followed. I actually smiled and got excited that we were having our first real thunderstorm! I can’t explain it, but I’ve just always enjoyed sitting outside on my balcony, excluding myself from the world and sitting in the presence of God during thunderstorms! 

Tonight was different though. Making my way over the Buchman bridge singing Shawn McDonald as loud as possible and laughing at people driving in the rain with their flashers on… The faces of those I met in Haiti started to come to mind. The children that fear the rain. The parents who wish they could protect those same children. The sickness and disease that’s starting to spread as water flows between the cracks of rubble, over the remains of those bodies still trapped and into the streets where people are now sleeping brought my laughter to an abrupt halt.

I started to tear up. I thought about how many people are sleeping under nothing but a canopy of clouds and stars. Not just in Haiti, but in our own backyard. The homeless. The less fortunate. Those with no roof. How many people, that as I get pissed off at the people driving slow in front of me, are praying that the rain stop falling so they can remain dry. I don’t think rain will always make me cry, but it will definitely always make me think. So many of us are so blessed while others are living in extreme poverty. Their hopes and dreams of one day having the life that we may or may not take for granted… is all they have.

So with that in mind; “Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again; Rejoice!” Philippians 4:4

For almost two years people could say that I have worked more than the average person. Owning and operating a non-profit, I’ve always felt the need to make sure things get done and I’ve never really trusted other people to get them done. Meaning I will work until the task at hand is accomplished, regardless of how much sleep I get. Prior to itsChance.com, I worked with Hurley, and prior to Hurley it was my own advertising and marketing firm. For each company, I literally worked myself like a rented mule.

From time to time my body would tell me that It had enough and I would sleep for 12 to 14 hours, but then I would be back on the grind for a week or two getting very little sleep if any at all. In my mind I knew it was unhealthy to treat my body this way, but I made the decision to keep doing it, no one forced me to.

As some of you may or may not have read, I blogged earlier this week on My Biggest Mistake so far this year. You can click the link to read it, but in general it’s changed my life in a lot of ways.  It’s made me completely change my schedule. Change how I treat people, and ultimately includes my outlook on work. So for all the leaders, the business people and the go getters, here are two main lessons I have learned from living in an unhealthy work environment:

1) You have to put yourself before anything else, including work. When I say this, I don’t mean be arrogant or prideful and only think about yourself… but the reality of it is, if you aren’t healthy there is no way you can help anyone else become healthy or remain healthy! Healthy means:

- Jesus Christ is at the front of everything you do. You have to pursue God. If your spiritual walk is suffering, you aren’t going to be 100%. ( Matthew 6:33-34 )

- You are surrounded with healthy relationships! You have people speaking into your life and keeping you accountable for things. ( Proverbs 18:24 )

- You are eating and exercising. It may seem over rated, but if you really cared about your work, you’d want to do it for as long as you could, being in good health is a huge part of that. ( Galatians 5:22-23 )

2) You have to prioritize what is most important to you.  When you drown yourself in work you begin to ignore and abuse the things God has intended for you. Yes, He want’s us to be hard workers, but he’s called us to fellowship with other people! This can be done in a bible study, on a softball team, or just hanging out. This could be a family member, a friend, a husband or wife or even boyfriend or girlfriend. But you have to really check yourself and find out what means the most to you. What are you working so hard for?? I know for me, it really hits home because:

- Jesus Christ wasn’t my main priority, meaning my “defense system” was down and Satan was able to kick me in the face. ( Mark 14:38 )

- I wasn’t surrounding myself or rather giving myself, to those who were here for me. Truly being there for others! From family, friends, the closest men in my life, and even someone I claimed to love. ( Philippians 2:3-8 )

- People that were expecting things of me, were let down because I would put work above their expectations. From commitments to help others, to be there for others and just be a friend. And therefor I was causing others to be angry, not addressing the issues and moving forward.. ( Ephesians 4:26 )

So really challenge yourself, what are you working so hard for? And are you willing to make changes even if it means admitting you’ve been in the wrong?? I know first hand that these things make a huge difference, because for almost two weeks now I’ve disciplined myself to waking up at 4:30am. Jogging and working out. Cooking a healthy breakfast. Being alone with God, praying and reading his word. I’ve left my computer at the office instead of taking it home. I haven’t stayed later than 6:00pm. I’ve gone and hung out with friends after the office. I literally turn my phone off at 9:00pm and I’m asleep by 10:00pm.  And not everyone needs THIS particular schedule!! I just know last night I was at the office late, and it messed up my entire moral. It was harder to wake up this morning. I’ve struggled today to be on top of my game and here I am typing what I’ve learned at 9:43pm.

I can see a huge difference in striving to do it God’s way and being stubborn and accepting my way.  God has so many incredible things for us, we just have to make him the reason we do everything! So if it isn’t God calling to you be a slave to your work…

Why are you really doing it and neglecting everything else he’s trying to bless you with?

In the first 65 days of 2010, more has happened to me than I was ever expecting when the clock struck midnight and 2009 ended. I’ve seen a dead body torn into pieces. I’ve traveled outside of the country. I’ve lost focus. I’ve experienced unconditional love. I’ve experienced an earthquake. I’ve enrolled in EMT & Firefighter school. I’ve broken the heart of an amazing woman. And I’ve broken down to the point where I’m forced to look up.

My entire life I have been taught to prioritize. Year after year I have always been under the impression that it’s Jesus. Family. Church. Work. My plans for 2010 were no different. It really doesn’t seem like that bad of a list. But I’ve come to learn that it’s flawed. Anytime that we make a list, we leave room for compromise. God’s used the things that have taken place so far this year to show me that.

In life we will sometimes choose work over the church. We may choose obligations at work over the person that loves us unconditionally. We may even choose church over that person that loves us! Nothing mentioned is acceptable, but it does happen. Bringing forth a very big realization in putting Jesus Christ on a list… We may not mean too and even though it’s not right, we end up placing things on our list, on hold, and I’m guilty of putting God on hold. That’s been my biggest mistake and I was wrong!

JESUS CHRIST IS NOT SOMETHING TO BE PLACED ON A LIST!

We have to make the decision that Jesus is LIFE. That whether it be Family, Church, Work or anything else, Jesus Christ is all we do. Jesus is the REASON for all that we do! He isn’t a priority we place on a list. He is the list. He’s involved in every aspect of our life. I have been studying God’s word a lot lately and this hit me harder, I think, than anything ever has:

“Therefore if you have been raised up with Christ, keep seeking the things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. ²Set your mind on the things above, not on the things that are on earth. ³For you have died and your life is hidden with Christ in God.⁴When Christ, who is our life, is revealed, then you also will be revealed with Him in glory.”Colossians 3:1-4

Wow!! As Christians, claiming to have new life with Christ, we are called to die to ourselves. Our “list.” We are called to focus on nothing less than things above. No exception, nothing here on earth. Meaning that God is going to use us for HIS WILL and we will be seen only for doing things that bring Him Glory. At times this may mean that we have very little of what we want, but as long as we are in the will of God it doesn’t matter. It’s a choice we have to make.

In the passage from Colossians, Paul tells us to “Set your mind on things above…” The greek verb for set emphasizes an ongoing decision. We must continually discipline ourselves to focus on eternal realities, instead of the temporal realities of this earth. So much easier said than done.

Example: There are nights that I fall asleep remembering what I saw in Haiti and it makes me cry. There are decisions I’ve made that hurt others. I feel some moments from this year I could live “in” forever and be happy. There are things that I wish I could do more of and wish I could change… but ultimately those are things that I want.

I’m being disciplined right now to focus on what God desires of me each day, to bring Him Glory. I know that it will be humbling, may hurt at times, and not always what I want. But as Im on my knees, broken and looking towards Jesus Christ, that is what he’s telling me to do! Start over and make him the priority. I’m choosing to continue pursuing His will for my life and I’m throwing my list out the window. The end.

Just because I needed something funny…

For quite some time I have been getting advice from the Second book of Justification rather than the Bible.  As an organization, I have justified in my head why It was a good idea to keep quiet about Jesus;  Rather than proudly proclaiming who he is within itsChance. Excuses were related to receiving grants, being allowed in schools, “religion” turning people away, etc etc. This has proven to be devastating to my personal walk with Jesus, this is why:

-If God has called you to something, and you try to take God out of it, you lose focus of why you are doing it. You begin to accept the praises of man rather than the satisfaction in Christ.

-Because you start becoming comfortable with mans acceptance, your defenses fall and you become more vulnerable to what Satan may attack you with.

-As Christians we are called to a “higher standard” of life. When you hide your cross you hide the opportunity for others to hold you accountable.

I say all these things, having experienced them first hand. I let the thought that “religion” turns people away outweigh the fact the love of Jesus Christ radically changes someone’s life. In doing so I hurt others, I haven’t been living each day to the full potential, but more importantly it caused me to stumble as a leader. I lost focus. I became comfortable. Satan attacked. And I had the lack of accountability that I should. I literally put my cross in my pocket for no one else to see.

I’m not sure what God has in store for me, but I know that the key to being successful is found here:

“This book of the law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success.” Joshua 1:8

I’m not beating myself up. I’m not seeking pity or a pat on the back. I’m just choosing to be transparent. As both an individual and the founder of itsChance, things have to change in some regards. I have to pray daily. Seek God’s guidance. Have those that hold me accountable. Not be ashamed of Jesus Christ. And most importantly, let my actions speak louder than words!

From this point forward, it’s not going to be hidden that itsChance is an organization that provides serving outlets, outreach opportunities, and education that helps build strong communities and leadership qualities. But also for empowering young adults with the promises of Jesus Christ for their life! He IS the reason itsChance exist.